by Damon Martin – Editor/Lead Writer
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True Blood season 6 returns on Sunday night with the second episode and major events are rumored to go down in the town of Bon Temps. Before the new episode airs on HBO Sunday night (kicks off at 9pm ET/PT0 check out our recap of the first episode with every detail you could possibly need heading into episode two!
(As with all recaps please be aware spoilers ahead!)
The sixth season of True Blood kicked off by literally picking up seconds after last year ended with a bloody pile of goo reanimating itself to become Bill Compton 2.0 or better yet “Billith”.
Bill sucked down the last remaining blood from the original vampire Lillith, and the result was a reborn, bloody and naked Stephen Moyer, who immediately went after Eric and Sookie as they quickly high tailed it out of the Authority’s secret lair. Billith didn’t manage to catch up with the pair, but it’s unclear they were even his true objective because he quickly began dismantling the joint, setting it on fire, and breaking gas pipes to ensure the place was leveled to the ground.
Outside, Jason, Pam, Tara, Jessica and Nora battled Bill’s guards so they could make their escape, and as usual Jason had the lion’s share of one-liners during these exchanges. Once outside, the crew meets up with Eric and Sookie who have secured an SUV big enough for seven people to climb into so they can make their escape from the burning building. Just as they speed away they catch a glimpse of bloody naked Bill standing outside the fire.
It doesn’t look like Bill is following, but it’s much more eloquently put by Jason who says he’s not tracking them unless “he’s flying over our heads like a naked, evil Superman”. Luckily for everyone involved, Bill-El is not jetsetting over head and the crew gets away long enough to make it to the beach for a little pow-wow amongst the group.
Jason’s Had Enough with Vampires
As dumb and two dimensional as Jason Stackhouse has appeared through much of the first five seasons of True Blood, deep down the creators of the show have made him an integral part of the series and a much bigger player than some may realize.
Following their escape from the Authority hideout, Jason’s had enough with the vampire population in his home state and he’s happy to tell any fanger hanging around. When Eric’s sister Nora suggests that Jason knows more about what’s going on than anybody else because he mentioned the name Warlow to her, she immediately glamours the pretty, dumb blonde to get the information she needs from him.
You see as it turns out Warlow is not only the vampire who killed Jason and Sookie’s parents, while also receiving a fairy contract for Sookie’s life—he also happens to be the ancient progeny of the original vampire Lillith.
Jason divulges what little information he has on Warlow, but once Nora’s spell is broken he immediately puts a gun to her chest and says he’s sick and tired of vampires “mind raping” him. Eric of course doesn’t take kindly to the threat and says the only reason Jason is still alive is because of his own sister Sookie. Jason’s anger boils over and he even calls Tara a fanger at this point because he’s fed up with the bloodsuckers in his life.
When Sookie steps in between his gun and Nora, that’s his breaking point. Jason explodes on his sister, who clearly has shown her devotion and loyalty to the vampires over her own blood for the last time. Jason denounces his relationship with Sookie and runs away.
Covered in vampire blood and dressed head to toe in black, Jason looks like he’s just gotten back from a Gwar concert, but still tries to stick out his thumb looking for a ride back to Bon Temps. That’s when he’s greeted by an old station wagon driven by a grey haired man, who is quickly revealed as new True Blood actor Rutger Hauer.
It was a perfect setup because one of Hauer’s most memorable roles was that of The Hitcher in the classic 1986 film where he terrorizes C. Thomas Howell after he gets picked up on the side of the road looking for a ride.
In the car, Jason unloads his soul about everything that’s happened with his sister and his numerous encounters with vampires. Just then, the crusty old man comes to life and says he can’t protect his sister Sookie from Warlow—knowing her name despite Jason never revealing that information to him. Jason quickly realizes he’s been sharing a car ride with the vampire who murdered his parents, but before he can draw his gun, Warlow has vanished into the night and he’s about to crash into a tree.
Sam Loses Luna, Gains a Daughter and Lafayette Steals the Show Again
Our favorite family of shifters pops out from the hole the Authority had them stashed in as the episode starts, but it’s clear right away that Luna is not going to make it. She begs Sam to leave her there, but to protect her daughter at all costs.
Sam takes Emma back to his bar where he quickly hears rustling coming from the back. He grabs up a pool cue but runs into the sound of a shotgun being aimed at his head. Luckily for Sam (who literally brought a wooden stick to a gun fight) it’s Lafayette brandishing the weapon. The flamboyant scene stealer was in the back recovering from a night of one too many, before revealing that Luna’s transformation from her Steve Newlin body suit was all the rage on the news.
Lafayette quickly sets eyes on Emma who proceeds to tell him that her mom is dead and she’s hungry. Being the best mama bear on the entire show since Sookie’s grandmother died in season one, Lafayette scoops up the little girl to make her something fried, dipped in sugar and fried all over again while promising never to divulge that he saw her or Sam that night.
“Wrong place at the wrong f—king time should be my middle f—king name,” Lafayette says before fading to the back to take care of Emma while Sam hopefully rids himself of the bloody clothes he’s been wearing for far too long.
Billith and His Progeny
Bill Compton is a man with some new powers at his disposal because he decides he wants a heart to heart with his little girl Jessica. No, he doesn’t ring her cell phone or even send a raven from Castle Black (yes, I’m still stuck on Game of Thrones).
No, instead Bill summons his “daughter” and the force is so strong it literally forces her to move, but when Eric blocks her from traveling to her maker she spouts up blood from every orifice and feels like her heart is being ripped from her chest. Eventually, Sookie decides to take Jessica to Bill to stop her from being torn apart right on front of their eyes.
Sookie and Jessica discover Bill on the terrace of his Governor’s mansion, but before any heartfelt moments are had, Eric and Nora crash the party.
It probably seemed like a good plan at the time, but Bill was having none of it.
He quickly tosses Nora to the side like a bean bag and picks up Eric by the throat, slamming him against a pole on the porch. Sookie has seen enough and plunges a stake through Bill’s heart, hopefully bringing this lunacy to an end.
Once again, probably seemed like a good plan at the time.
Bill removes the stake from his chest, feeling no ill effects from the wooden plank just shoved through his heart (in case you were curious, stake through the heart is supposed to kill any vampire). Jessica decides to stay with her maker and demands that Eric, Nora and Sookie get out.
At home, maker and progeny have a goodnight story that involves Bill explaining that he really has no idea what he is now, but he wants Jessica to become his conscience as he tries to understand what exactly is happening to him. Jessica agrees to take this new responsibility and gives Bill an embrace before laying down to bed.
The Governor Is On a Rampage
The Governor (not the one from The Walking Dead) of Louisiana has had enough with vampire violence against the human population of his state. He declares that he’s now taking the war back to the fangers by declaring a new curfew, while also stating that all vampire owned businesses will be shut down by the government.
A few scenes later while Pam and Tara commiserate about Eric’s latest dismissal of his progeny, the armed guards bust through the doors of Fangtasia to lay down the law. Tara tries to defend her maker, but quickly takes a shot to the chest. She doesn’t die so whatever was used wasn’t lethal, but judging by her screams it certainly did not feel very good.
The Governor (played by Arliss Howard who will forever be Private Cowboy in Full Metal Jacket to me) then pops up at a factory where he’s meeting with the manufacturers of True Blood. He has a golden offer—the company can use his bottling plant to restart production of the synthetic blood drink that keeps vampires fed, but he will remain a silent partner just reaping the financial benefits.
He promises he’s not the new “big bad” they need to fear (great tribute, if on purpose, to the best vampire show in the history of television Buffy the Vampire Slayer), and the two parties strike a deal so that a new True Blood factory can be fired up immediately.
Fatherhood Finds Andy
Last season, Sheriff Andy Bellefleur found out he was going to be a daddy after laying down with a fairy on a couple of occasions. What he didn’t expect was for his fairy sex romp to pop out four babies and then up and leave him to raise them all.
Back at home, Andy sits outside wondering how the hell he landed in this situation when he’s greeted by Arlene, who has been tending to the kids along with his cousin Terry. Arlene offers little sympathy to an obviously bewildered Andy when she says “this is what happens when you stick Mr. Happy into somebody’s hoo-ha without a raincoat” (great advice to anybody reading this column actually).
Arlene is able to comfort Andy enough to coax him back into the house so he can change one of his daughter’s diapers.
Following a night of screaming babies and poop filled diapers, Andy is catching some sleep on the couch when he’s awoken by a smiling little girl who appears to be about four years old.
“Hi daddy!” the little girl says as Andy can only scream in terror as he wakes up and sees all four of his babies are now quickly on their way to being grown up. Terry and Arlene unleash a terror filled scream of their own as well for good measure.
Alcide Reaps the Benefits of Being Packmaster
At the end of last season, Alcide finally took his pack back when he sucked down some vampire blood and killed J.D. with a good old fashioned neck breaking (I’m still curious to this day how many people have had their necks broken that way?). Now the pack of wolves is feasting on their former leader, and to become packmaster Alcide has to taste the flesh as well.
Alcide decides to take a big bite out of J.D.’s arm, and immediately he catches eyes with a female wolf named Danielle, who seems all too happy to welcome her new buff packmaster into leadership. In the distance, Martha and Rikki can’t help but notice that just a few seconds into his administration and Alcide already seems to be enjoying his new found power.
The entire pack decides to go for a run, and when they shift again Alcide and Danielle are in the woods where they opt for a little in the woods action when Rikki pops up and pushes the new pup out of the way so she can have some time with the new packmaster.
Danielle limps away, but is quickly called back to service her packmaster (literally), but Rikki reminds him and the new girl that she is “No. 1 bitch”.
The episode ended on a confusing note because Bill decided to sit down for a read before bed, and was quickly consumed with visions of a fiery whipping that disturbed his downtime. He then heard a calling from another room with “William Compton” being whispered throughout the house.
Bill enters his office to find naked, bloody Lillith there to meet him. He looks around and sees two more bloody, naked girls also in the corners of the room. All three bum rush Bill and enter his body as spirits as the episode comes to a close.
The next episode of True Blood will air next Sunday night at 9pm ET/PT on HBO